I Might Have Ambushed My Mom into Decluttering Her Room

I might have ambushed my mom into decluttering her room last Friday.

Okay…maybe “ambushed” is a little dramatic. 😂

It didn’t exactly start out that way.

My mom is getting a new desktop computer this week, and she really didn’t have anywhere to put it. So, we needed to figure out where it was going to go.

Now, to be fair, I had been planting the seeds for a while that it was probably time to start organizing her room. It’s her own space in our home, and I want her to feel calm and comfortable when she’s in there.

But I think it finally hit her that it was time to go through some things.

A Little Background

My mom retired from the State of Colorado two years ago. When she retired, she moved to Tennessee to live with us.

That was always the plan.

My mom was always going to live with us after she retired and after my grandmother passed away.

The problem was…things happened a lot sooner than any of us expected.

So, here we are, almost two years later, and I think she finally realized that some of the things she brought with her simply didn’t need to keep taking up space in her room.

It started innocently enough.

We decided to clear out from under her bed.

Her room isn't huge, so storing things under the bed in packing cubes had seemed like a pretty good solution at the time.

We went through Christmas blankets. Those were re-homed to the shed.

We went through her winter clothes, and she admitted that she hated some of them. Those went into the donation pile.

And since we were already dealing with clothes, we moved on to her closet.

She had some things in there that really had no business being in a closet, so those went to the shed too.

Well…

We didn’t stop there.

That’s the Thing About Clutter

To be fair, my mom moved here before we had a shed. So a lot of her things didn't really have anywhere else to go.

Then we got the shed.

But by that point, she had become so used to having those things in her room that they didn't really bother her anymore.

She had simply adjusted.

And that's the thing about clutter.

We get used to it.

We get so accustomed to seeing stuff around us that we don't even realize how much we've adjusted our lives around it.

We climb over things to get to something else.

We cover tabletops because we don't have anywhere else to put things.

We forget what we own because it's stuffed into a box somewhere.

And sometimes, tucked away inside those boxes, are treasures.

Things that bring back wonderful memories.

Things we might actually enjoy seeing or using.

But we don't see them because we've packed them away for “safekeeping.”

Sometimes the Things We Keep Need to Be Seen

I found a slim little box among my mom's things.

I knew she hadn't seen it in years.

Inside was a beautiful Japanese fan that someone had given her.

I asked her why she had kept it in a box.

“Because I don't want it to get messed up,” she said.

So I asked her:

“Then why have it if you aren't going to enjoy it—or at least look at it?”

And just like that, the fan came out of the box.

Now it's on display in her room, adding a little beauty and color to the space.

We also found Mickey Mouse measuring cups and spoons she had purchased on a Disney trip with my boys.

Those came out of storage too.

They're now part of her regular baking supplies because my mom is our resident baker. Banana bread, muffins, quiche…whatever she decides to make that day. 😂

Those things weren't clutter.

They were treasures.

They just needed to be seen and used.

And Then We Kept Going…

Since we had already built some momentum, we kept going.

Dresser drawers.

The armoire.

Files.

And, of course, the junk box.

Come on…you know you have one too. 😂

And as we went through everything, something interesting happened.

My mom started realizing that maybe she didn't actually need—or even want—a lot of the things she had been keeping.

And by the end of the day, her room felt completely different.

She could find her things.

She didn't have to scoot around the trunk that had been sitting on the floor.

She didn't have to remember which box she had shoved something into.

Everything was organized and easy to see.

The room felt calm, peaceful and spacious.

Two Days Later…

I asked her how she liked her room.

She said:

“I LOVE it.”

And I can tell she really does.

Of course, we still joke that I'm not allowed back into her room for a while. 😂

But I think she likes having a space that feels like her again.

And here's the thing I really want you to take away from this.

You don't need a giant decluttering plan to get started.

Sometimes you just need someone to help you figure out where to begin.

Especially when you're overwhelmed.

You don't have to make 47 decisions before you start.

You can start with one drawer.

One closet.

One box under the bed.

And sometimes, when you start looking through those things, you discover treasures you completely forgot you had.

The beautiful fan.

The Mickey Mouse measuring cups.

The things that have a story attached to them.

You Don't Have to Do It Alone

Every decision we made that day was my mom's.

I didn't decide what she should keep.

I didn't decide what she should get rid of.

I simply asked questions.

Do you use this?

Do you like this?

Do you even remember what's in this box?

Would you rather have this taking up space here, or would you enjoy seeing it somewhere you can actually appreciate it?

Sometimes, we just need someone we trust to ask the right questions.

Someone who understands that our “stuff” isn't just stuff.

Some things carry memories.

Some things represent people we love.

Some things remind us of places we've been or experiences we've had.

And some things?

Well…some things are just junk. 😂

The trick is figuring out which is which.

So if you've been putting off decluttering because you don't know where to start, find someone you trust.

Someone who will respect your memories and your decisions.

Ask them to help you.

Chances are, you'll laugh.

You'll tell some stories.

You'll probably find a few treasures you forgot you had.

And when you're finished, you just might discover something else:

The lighter feeling that comes from letting go of the things that no longer serve a purpose.

Are we finished decluttering my mom's things?

Not a chance.

But all that Christmas stuff in the shed?

That's going to have to wait for another day. 😉